Spotted on my Twitter feed and related immediately
It’s 2017 seems like an appropriate response to most anything these days. The fact that I read an NYTimes article this week that said something like, the President broke the news on his Twitter account this morning. Or when I saw other women dressed in sleeveless dresses or shoes that looked more club than workplace at a job interview. I thought: It’s 2017. Maybe I missed the memo, that that’s okay now.
It’s 2017! If only that were a good thing, implying that society has improved. I read the above tweet and felt compelled to get on my podium. I don’t interpret the above tweet as please don’t interrupt us because, I’m a strong feminist woman, who ain’t need no man. What this means to me is, we have plenty of wonderful friends and loving family members. We don’t need another texting buddy, fbook messaging buddy, (insert other form of messaging or dm-ing here). If I want a new friend, I’ll make one. If I want someone to text or message, I have my friends.
In 2017, there’s this ridiculous frustrating gray area between no relationship and relationship. In that gray area, fall guys who randomly text you for weeks, months, sometimes even years in a manner that is flirting and would make any person think they’re interested. But then, they never do anything. He doesn’t ask you out on a date. He never calls you up on the phone. Women, myself included, get tricked by this weird gray area. You start to be interested too. You have hope. Why else would someone keep trying to talk to you if they weren’t interested?
I was so used to this kind of behavior that when my boyfriend came along, I had low expectations. Or no expectations. I thought he’d just randomly text me all semester long, like other guys had. He gets major points for also picking up the phone and calling me during that time period. And when he did tell me he liked me, it wasn’t over a text message, but on the phone, in words so jumbled, I wasn’t sure I’d heard right.
This rant is for all my single friends and all ladies. Men, you too, take note! You see an amazing, beautiful woman and your options are 1) do nothing 2) do something beyond being a texting, messaging buddy. Call her, ask her out on a date. I’ll admit that if all you’d like to do is pay us a classy compliment, those can be a welcome ego boost too.
My friends, you deserve someone who makes your life even better. Someone who makes more effort then just sending you all manner of e-messages. You deserve to be wined and dined. Someone who is there for you. No guessing games as to when he’ll text or contact you next. Make that no games at all. In 2017, there are still real relationships that haven’t deteriorated into other non-committal relationships, friends with benefits, hookup buddies, who knows what. There is hope. All you have to do is ask God for what you want and don’t settle for anything less.
I realize that ending sounds too tidy, too easy. Like I’m just trying to wrap up the post in a neat bow. But really, know your worth and don’t accept crumbs from crummy men or men who just aren’t that into you. Always, in this and everything else, “let your requests be made known to God,” a la Philippians 4:6. There’s no need to be anxious.